on RESPECT

That you may retain your self-respect, it is better to displease the people by doing what you know is right, than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong. -William J. H. Boetcker

This month of October began with a lot of struggles, conflicts and contradiction. One realization on an October incident served as an eye opener for me and some of my friends. In this regard, I would like to highlight one simple thought... does any one of you really understand the word RESPECT?

First let me give some scholarly definitions..

Merriam Webster defines respect as “the quality or state of being esteemed"

Kant's concept of Respect drills to the recognition and consideration of values, beliefs and rights of any people.

You may be asking why the word Respect? And how it is related to my story. Let me start with some narratives...

I was with COR on a gig last Thursday, September 30. We arrived at about 10 pm, was last on the list, but what the heck.. we're having fun. And so we watched the entire show, and 2 bands before COR's turn everybody was gone. I already noticed that most of the bands that played are starting to leave the premises. Another thing I noticed is that each band playlist consists of more than 5 songs. But, again that was ok. One thing an underground band would want is to play as much as they can on every gig. And so, patiently we've waited. At last, one more band to go, and it would be COR's set, I was really infuriated when they told us that COR had to play only 2 tracks... that blew me off.. We waited for almost 5 hours, to play for 2 songs, from which the only audience we have are the waiters. WOW! Even the gig organizer was gone (he said he had work and one of them even cursed his own job on mic!) And so, COR did their part and said their thanks and bid goodbyes to the waiters and sound director.

And so much for that unfortunate event. Come Friday morning, that incident is featured on my Facebook Status.  Hell yeah, I was really mad and had to let the steam out of me. That triggered a lot per se. One comment to another led to bad mouthing and lambasting one another on a social network site. I initially questioned respect for that matter. I felt that we were disrespected that night. It all started with a wall post in facebook, I want to dwell on the respect portion of the wall post. I questioned the gig organizer's definition of respect as it seems that there is a shallow understanding of it on his retaliation posts. 

On the said confilct, wan to point out two notions:

1. As ignorant and stupid anyone can be, if you are defending a particular act, let’s say RESPECT for that matter,  understand first what the word respect is. Yes, the organizer guy obviously does not know the meaning of it. On a blog he created to answer the wall post, he literally does not understand the word respect. He literally compared it to as showing his genital parts in public.. And now who opened a can of stupidity?

2. Regardless, of course, there is a proper channel and venue to send your message. I myself is guilty of it. Using the appropriate manner does not only illustrate maturity, but also respect. Social networking site is definitely not an avenue. This will only further the differences and misunderstanding, thus retaliation of bad mouths and lambasting one another results to disrespect.

So, what is it really all about then?

Lao Tzu said, respect begets respect. You cannot expect respect from others if you do not respect your own self. In the given scenario, as mature as these people can be, one thing that is highlighted is the lack of respect (take note, I am pertaining to Webster’s  and Kant's definition) or the understanding of it. Lambasting one another in public only shows how you comprehend the subject matter. Deal with it like a real man. Accept faults, move on with your life and take hold of the lessons learned. It would not make you a lesser person to accept your weakness. In life, accepting your weakness, and struggling to correct mistakes will make you a strong person. Maybe you will say that you know all of this already. Hell yeah! But why the hell are we still doing things that belittle our own self respect? I say simple things like whining and complaining about something and doing nothing about it is a mere evidence of our weakness and lack of self respect. 

So who now is due for respect? Why does people pay respect to someone  already dead? Why don't we start pondering now?

respect life... not only of the human being but also of any living thing..

respect mother earth..

respect human rights..

respect other people's values, ideas and belief...

respect culture...